Life is all about making choices. To choose from alternatives given. Sometimes it is hard to decide. Sometimes you might worry that you make the wrong desicion. And decisions that have been made cannot turn back. So when deciding on something, we must think properly the consequences that follow after that. Which is more important and so on.
Today is the 1st day I came back to UM for 2nd semester of studies. And today is the day which has made me decide a lot and I'm really tired of it.
Firstly is whether to apply for remark for my previous exam papers. I didn't do quite well for 2 subjects and at first I thought not to bother about it but this morning when I reached my faculty and saw the notice for remark, suddenly something struck my mind and I decided to send for remark because this is the chance for me to get better grades although it is risky. It's a hard choice but since I have submitted the form, what I can do is to wait and hope.
Then came to course registration. At first I have already registered according to the subjects that we need to take. But my friends kept giving comments on what we should take this semester and why. Some said take this subject for this semester would be easier... bla, bla, bla... and so on. Then, I decided to take on their advice and change one course and add extra one course. But when I wanted to add and drop, I couldn't add any more subjects because my maximum credit hours is 18 hours. At first, I was quite troubled with this matter, but after that, I told myself, since I've registered earlier and whatever it is, we still need to take all the subject is just the matter of time. So I made up my mind to stick with my old time table. Whatever it is, I just need to work harder. That's all!
I joined dancing for a musical performance which will be held on 21 January 2009. Yesterday I had just attended for the first practice. Actually tonight suppose to have another practice but the coach is sick so it is cancelled. I thought of going back to home town this weekend because coming weeks I will not be free to go back anymore till CNY. However, there will be dancing practice too this weekend. So now the problem that is troubling me is whether to go back home or stay in UM. Can you give me advice?
Haiz...
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Choices
Sunday, December 28, 2008
My Xmas Gfit
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Emptiness
I'm feeling empty. I'm feeling lonely. The emptiness within me is hard to describe. I don't know how to explain this feeling. It's weird. Why am I feeling this way? I keep asking myself the same question over and over again. But I can't seem to find an answer to it.
I have friends and family who would always be there for me when I need them. I am happy with my life now because I got to spend my time with friends and family. I appreciate them a lot, but still why am I feeling empty? I feel like lacking of something. But I don't know what. What can I fill in to make my heart full?
Is it because of love? But all this while I'm used to being single and I feel happy with my single life. As long as my friends and family are there, I'm already very grateful.
I hate this feeling of emptiness! It makes me sad and gloomy. Although I have had great time with my friends and family during this holiday, but I still feel lack of something. What is it?
There are so many things kept within myself that I wanted to find someone to share with. I know I can share with my best friends or my close family members. But they have their own lives. They have their own problems. They have their own things to do. I'm not the only one with this feeling. Maybe they have too, and feel just like the way I feel.
That is why I do not want to burden them with my matters anymore. So who should I seek?? Maybe I'm tired of being single. I need someone to talk to. I need someone who can share with me.
But it's not easy to find that someone. I hope that someone will appear in my life soon.
Friend's Birthday Celebration
Because Of You
The english version of Y2J
Ferris Wheel
Looking at the title, you must have thought, "Ya, ferris wheel... so? What's so nice about it?" Some of you might think that it's just a machine bringing us go up and down in a circle to amuse the passengers... or shall I say kids.
But to me, it is totally a different meaning. Ferris wheel is not just a machine or something for you to ride in. It's more than that. It moves in a circle. Do you know why?
To me, it represents our lives. It's a never ending cycle, never ending journey until the time the ferris wheel stops moving, when our lives stop the journey on earth.
When it's at the bottom, that's the time when you feel down. Your life seems to face with many problems. You feel like just giving up and you feel that it's hard to overcome your problems. You don't know what to do and you don't know how to do it. You don't know who to find. You feel like you are alone. This is the hardest part in our lives.
But if you have the will, you will continue non-stop to climb up. This is when the ferris wheel moves up. At this time you might feel hard as the climbing process is not easy. Don't be afraid to go on... because you are not alone. Seek your family and friends and you will realize how much they care for you. With their support, you go through it. When you start to see the beautiful scenery that surrounds you as the ferris wheel moves up, you will be more determined to reach to the highest peak.
Now, you have survived through all the obstacles and reach the top. You feel like you are on top of the world. The beautiful view of the world below you feels great. You feel like you have all the things you wanted. You are satisfied with your life. No regret. This is the happiest moment in your life. The glory in your life. You feel like staying on top forever and never wish to go down.
But this is life. This is the truth. As time passes by, you become older. Activites are reduced, you retire. This is the time you feel like you want to rest, have a peaceful life. The ferris wheel starts to move down. You do not wish to fight for glory any longer. You have passed through it before and now you just want to settle down peacefully. The scenery around you still looks beautiful. You enjoy the moment you are having now. You feel calm.
Now the ferris wheel is going to stop soon. It's going to reach the bottom. You know your life is coming to an end. You know your journey is going to end because you have reached the place. Although it's sad having to leave the ferris wheel knowing that you can no longer view the beautiful scenery. But you have ride through it once. You know how it feels. You have experienced it. You have no regret. You have nothing to hold you back. You have nothing left undone. The ferris wheel reaches the destination. It's time to say goodbye. You leave without any hesitation because you know this is LIFE'S JOURNEY.
Now you know why ferris wheel is meaningful to me? It represents my life. Life is not easy. But we only live life once. So live your life to the fullest while you can. Be bold to overcome all the problems and strive to reach to the top. Dream and make your dreams realize. Do not hesitate, do not fear. Fight for your goal. Only this then you will have no regret living in this world. Then when it's time to leave this world, you will have no regret. Because you know you have gone through all the things you have wanted before. There's nothing to hold you back. You leave in peace. This is life. You have the choice to decide on your life whether to ride in a ferris wheel or never ride it and stay at the bottom forever without even have the chance to look at the beautiful scenery.